And the winner is ...

Up close and personal with this year’s BodyBlitz Grand Champion Penny Mackinnon

On a hot afternoon in December, the BodyBlitz selection panel gathered around the boardroom table and set about the task of choosing our 2005 Grand Champion. Laid out in front of us, were over 14 monthly winners (some months it was a tie), each with an impressive story of transformation. If every picture tells a story, this was a good one. The major contrast between each and every before and after shot was impressive. A combined total exceeding 100 kilos had been shed, lives had been changed for good and a group of women had learnt to love their bodies in the most rewarding way: through healthy diet and exercise.

The process of elimination was one of the hardest yet. We scrutinised each diet, story, measurement and training plan. Finally, after a good few hours, we were left with one set of photos and one inspiring journey.

35-year-old Penny Mackinnon had always been one of the main contenders. A Melbourne-based architect, Penny has been on the diet merry-go-round for much of her life, struggling with weight gain, low self-esteem and depression. In her third attempt to conquer her weight, Penny entered the 12-week BodyBlitz Challenge. Like many women, the inciting moment ocurred during a beach holiday. Faced with the prospect of shedding her ‘fat clothes’, Penny spent most of the holiday covered up and miserable. With the realisation that this unhappiness was not particularly healthy for herself or her marriage, Penny returned home and embarked upon the 12-week Challenge. This is her story.....

Tell us about your experience with depression and how your transformation is helping you overcome this?

I have suffered from depression at varying degrees of severity since I was about 16. When I started the Challenge, my depression was mild and under control with the help of drugs. I had become resigned to the fact that there would always be a black cloud looming over me, yet I was finding the side-effects of the anti-depressants increasingly unacceptable. I was hoping to find a more natural way to control my illness and I had heard about the benefits of exercise and alcohol reduction in the treatment of depression. Three weeks into the Challenge I noticed a significant improvement in my mental state and I stopped taking the anti-depressants. I am sure that the combination of regular intense exercise, a healthy diet, a significant reduction in alcohol consumption and plenty of sleep was the key to my recovery. Seeing a fitter and healthier version of one’s self in the mirror is enough to put anyone in a good mood, but it is important to note that this was not the answer in itself. It was the lifestyle changes I had to make in order to bring about my transformation that had the greatest impact. I feel confident that I can maintain control over my depression for as long as I can maintain my new lifestyle.

When did you decide to get fit for life?
My husband and I spent a week in Bali in early 2004. I had spent the entire holiday shrouded in flowing cotton shirts and long draw-string pants because I was too ashamed to be seen in bathers or summery dresses. Those constant feelings of shame and self-consciousness literally ruined that holiday, and many other occasions that should otherwise have been very happy ones. When I returned, I decided enough was enough ... it was time to find a permanent solution to the problem.

Had you tried before?
I have tried many times before. I would go on crash diets and lose a few kilograms, then I would invariably feel so deprived that I would give up and proceed to put the weight straight back on! The cycle of feeling fat and ashamed, crash dieting then re-gaining weight would continue over and over. Until now I have never been able to develop a balanced diet and exercise regime that I could happily maintain on a permanent basis.

What do you think were the contributing factors to your weight problems? Was this directly reflected in your self-perception?
I think the greatest single contibuting factor to my weight problem was emotional eating and drinking. Bored, sad, happy or stressed, I would head for comfort food or alcohol ... in large quantities. I had not developed the skills to tackle my issues head-on, nor was I looking for alternative ways of gaining fulfillment. The resulting effect on my body had an enormous impact on my very sorry self-perception, and in turn my self-perception continued to drive my bad habits.

What sort of excuses did you make for your diet and lack of fitness?
You name it, and I probably came up with it! I’m too busy.... I’m too tired.... I’m too depressed.... I’m too stressed.... Winter’s here, I can cover up.... Life will be no fun without food and wine.... I hate exercise.... I can’t do it.... What’s the point? I’ll start tommorow...I’ll start next month.... 

How did you overcome this?
I came to recognise them as excuses and trained myself to ignore them!

What sort of a support group did you call on to help you achieve your goal?
Before I started the Challenge, I sat my husband and step-sons down and explained to them what I was about to embark upon and why. It is very unlike me to call a formal family meeting, so that in itself really did reinforce how important the Challenge was to me. They happily promised their support, and knowing I had that throughout the 12 weeks made it very difficult for me to go back on the commitment I had made to myself.

What obstacles stood in your way?
My own self-doubts were the greatest obstacle. I often questioned my ability and motives and would regularly invent new reasons to give up. When I was feeling tired or emotional I could feel myself slipping back into old habits, and it took a lot of strength to bring myself out of that. Social situations were also major obstacles, and I often felt pressure to eat and drink with my friends. Whenever possible, I would try to meet friends for a walk instead of a wine and I would cook healthy dinner parties at home rather than eat at restaurants.

Who did you draw inspiration from?
All the BodyBlitz Grand Champions and monthly winners from the past.

As a child what sort of a relationship did you have with food?
I tended to eat what I was given, which was usually very healthy and well balanced, however I never saw healthy food as something to get excited about. In grade four I was comparing my thighs with my cousin and decided that I was fat and that’s when it all began! I seem to remember giving up ice-cream and gravy in an effort to be like my skinny cousin!

What have been the key changes in terms of diet?
I eat a lot more now than I ever used to, yet the bulk of it tends to have a low- energy density. I have plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables, lean meat and fish, complex carbohydrates, nuts and low-fat dairy. I have ditched my emotional eating habits but still allow myself the occasional treat.

What have been the key changes in terms of exercise?
Consistency and intensity. I go to the gym six days a week whether I feel like it or not and I refuse to listen to my excuses! I set myself mini-goals throughout my workouts and try to out-do myself!

What has been the reaction from people around you?
The biggest reactions have come from people I don’t see very often, who have not witnessed the evolution. I bumped into a friend who had been on holiday with us last year and she didn’t recognise me. I had to re-introduce myself!

What sort of positive experiences have you had through your physical change?
It has been wonderful to feel my fitness and energy levels increasing, to be more productive and to sleep so well. Throwing out my fat clothes was a fabulous experience, as was shopping for new ones and getting into sizes I never thought I would be able to fit into. Going to parties feeling glamorous, receiving compliments from complete strangers and helping to inspire others has been a huge buzz.

What about emotional change?
Being freed from the emotions that come with depression has been extraordinary. I feel as though that black cloud has been blown away. The whole experience has had a tremendous effect on my self-esteem, but not so much because of what I now see in the mirror. I have discovered a level of inner strength and determination that I did not realise I had, leaving me with the sense that I have the power to achieve in all other aspects of my life.

What has been one of the valuable lessons you have learnt?
Harness the power of your mind and you can achieve almost anything.

How have your husband and stepchildren benefited from this lifechange?
I think the boys miss my lasagne, but find me a happier person to be around!

Has it been difficult at times?
It has been very difficult at times and I am sure there will be more difficult times ahead. Changing life-long habits is never an easy task, even when you are at your strongest, and when things are tough it can seem almost impossible. It is very easy to slip back into old habits, to find excuses not to exercise and to give into the temptations that constantly bombard us. 

What do you think the key is/will be to maintaining your new look?
Constantly re-motivating myself, creating new challenges and focusing on the benefits of my achievements.

What advice would you offer to women who are looking at making a change?
Stop making excuses and just do it! Make a solemn commitment to yourself and do everything within your power to honor that commitment. Seek help wherever you can find it, get the support of family and friends and try to make the process as enjoyable
as possible.

What sort of resources helped you achieve your transformation?
Knowing the facts about diet and exercise was an extremely important part of the process. I read magazine articles, calorie and fat charts, diet recipe books, searched through internet sites and read several books on weight-training. Keeping a record of my daily calorie intake and expenditure for the first few weeks of the Challenge was also a very valuable tool. My personal trainer (in the year prior to the Challenge) Ben Schwartz, really gave me the fundamental knowledge of technique, form and intensity etc. that enabled me to train myself for the Challenge.